Sadness
It is weird, having spent the better part of the last fourteen days back and forth between the hospital (yay for the flexibility of consulting work), I guess you might expect one to be a bit depressed. Yet, I've been a bit too dazed from the rushing about and all that's happened to really get to that point — and I'm not really there yet. Quite to the contrary, I think things are finally progressing for Dad, albeit slowly, and that makes me feel hopeful.
Yet, I've felt a profound sadness today. I had a dream last night that reminded me of something that I had shoved to the back of my mind — nothing big, really. I take that back — I shouldn't say it isn't big, just not the thing that needs to be dealt with at this moment. But it snowballed and made me think deeper and deeper about things, and it, well, has made me rather depressed today. It's funny how things like that work. The things that should make one depressed don't always and much more distant things may in fact do just that.
I'm not sure why I'm writing this, but there you are. I'll try to write something more cheerful tomorrow.
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Re: Sadness
My family’s cultural background contrasts radically with yours. If I were in the hospital, even in severe trouble, I’d really not be happy seeing my family hanging around day after day. Maybe a brief hello every other day. I’d much prefer to be alone, or see the occasional stranger. Most of us feel that way. We don’t want to be seen like that, knowing we aren’t fit company for anyone when feeling bad. If I were to die, most of my family would get over it quickly enough. That sounds callous, but it’s the attitude of the lower classes, especially when we know the dying are safe in Christ. It would be different only with my wife.
I’m glad you have time to do what is normal for you.
Re: Sadness
Well, my family has always been a family that was big into togetherness. As far as Dad goes, he much prefers having his family, particularly those of us living in the area, visiting him to others. All three pastors from church have visited at least once, as have numerous friends from church and elsewhere, but then he feels like he needs to “entertain.” Ditto out of town family.
I’m not sure about having time to do what is normal. What time I have has typically been when I’ve been too drained to do too much. Although you may be referring to my hard disk organization project, in which case I guess you have somewhat of a point. Unfortunately my writing and reading have suffered a lot. I was given C.S. Lewis’ Miracles for Christmas and haven’t even had a point where time and energy coincided enough to start reading it.
Re: Sadness
By “have time to do what’s normal for you” I meant that you have the sort of job that allows you to visit your Dad, which is “normal” for you when folks are in the hospital. My family loves togetherness, but it’s just a different way of looking at it.