The Commercial

By Timothy R Butler | Posted at 12:15 AM
(Or Ode to Milton's Fallen Hero.)
“Step right up and order now,”
Cried he with the miracle cleaner on tee-vee.
“It'll clean off anything, I'll show you how.”

“I was as dumb as a cow,
No longer, thanks to this fruit - you see?
Step right up and order now.

But she protested, “we aren't to touch this bough,
It would be a sin, that's key!”
“It'll clean off anything, I'll show you how.”

“Sin,” laughed he, “just use this, I vow;
Spotless and smarter you'll be.
Step right up and order now.

So she, and he too, ate the chow.
They saw the sale 'twas faulty.
“It'll clean off anything, I'll show you how.”

What a trick, but the trick's on thou,
Never listen when they say slyly
“Step right up and order now,
It'll clean off anything, I'll show you how.

Well, this is a bit more substantial than my haiku from last night, although whether it is any good is an entirely different question. I actually thought it up while writing Haiku II last night, but I was too tired to write it out at that point. I guess this could be called a metaphysical poem, although Donne need not worry that I will be taking his place any time soon.

Join the Conversation

3 comments posted so far.

RE: The Commercial

great poem it reminded me of that product oxi clean at first then i was like oops. Adam and Eve would have been so lucky to have only discovered oxi clean instead of sin.

Posted by Thunder - Dec 01, 2004 | 12:49 AM- Location:

RE: The Commercial

Good association, the Father of Lies alongside advertisers. Cynicism can be holy.

Posted by Ed Hurst - Dec 01, 2004 | 2:17 PM- Location: Rural SE Texas

RE: The Commercial

Thunder: Thanks! Good point Oxi Clean vs. sin. :-)

Ed: Thanks, I thought it fit pretty well. “Holy Cynicism,” eh?

Posted by Timothy R. Butler - Dec 02, 2004 | 5:28 PM- Location: MO

Create or Sign In to Your Account

Post as a Visitor

:mrgreen: :neutral: :twisted: :arrow: :shock: :smile: :???: :cool: :evil: :grin: :idea: :oops: :razz: :roll: :wink: :cry: :eek: :lol: :mad: :sad: :!: :?:
Remember my information